Too good to be forgotten

I want to delete this post since it already in the draft for 2 years, but when I reread...it was beautiful. 

I write here for me to cherish these memories forever. Will start working soon...mixed of feeling to be honest. Kind of sad and random writing tonight. Time flew so fast.

Tq for let me teach your children while I'm still studying. I truly appreciate, you still choose me despite all the dedicated teachers listed in that area. You called me cikgu despite knowing the fact that I'm still a student.

Tq for all the food given and your trust. Your children made my day whenever I feel blue or demotivated. Never once I regret teaching your children, they gave me lots of beautiful memories. My housemates will be very excited whenever I come home with the food given by the parent, and of course Tupperware collection everywhere.

"I haven't return all your Tupperware."

"It's ok Aini, no need."

Thank god alhamdulillah tq, because I think some of them gone already. Don't know where did I put it. Can't even remember which one is yours, too many Tupperware in the kitchen.

Feeling exhausted during the day and life was busy back then...but whenever I come to teach, I gain my energy. Hence I decided to continue teaching until early Year 5. Plus you treat me very well, how can I simply let go of your children? 

I started to slow down during Year 5, reducing the number of students to teach because I can't commit and it was very challenging for me. 

Please do well in school, you're strong right?

I fell asleep during teaching and awoke when my student asked: "How to do this one teacher?". That day was crazy, bedside teaching ended at 7.15 pm and tutor at 8 pm. Sometimes I've to postpone my tutor due to unpredictable schedule. 

That first moment when I received a message "Selamat Hari Guru", hahah I thought you whatsapp me to ask for questions. Feeling grateful that morning. 

Sometimes I feel guilty for choosing private tutor over medicine, but nothing else seemed to matter. Teaching makes me happy during that time.

There were times I've to sacrifice. I can't attend farewell party with my classmates and staffs during Family Medicine posting because of tutor. Sad of course because I learnt a lot with them, one of the best posting ever. 

Meanwhile in Radiology posting, I wanted to excuse early since I had tutor at 5pm. So I wanted to go out at 4.35 pm. That day I attached at MRI room and specialist everywhere. How can I escape out of sudden?

Me talking to a specialist: Can I excuse early today? I got some work to do.

Specialist: Why? What work is that?

Me: Private tutor, I've class at 5 pm.

And automatically the whole room looked at me, like a robot who previously focused on the screen and suddenly turned their head towards me. Please, just let me go. Don't ask any further. 

Specialist: Oh...ok. Give me your logbook, let me sign.

What a moment to be remembered. I started to miss all the unpredictable schedule.

Not to forget when my car broke down. I took a grab to teach because it was very hard to make time to replace the missed class… sometimes the parent offer to sent me off. Tq, my housemate will pick me up. Too good to be forgotten.

Sometimes I picked them up from school, stay over to accompany them since the parent are very busy. I learnt a lot. Their class end at 1.30 pm and sometimes 4.30 pm. Upon arrival...

"Which one? Omg which one?? I can't differentiate them since all of the students wear mask."

As a solution, I wear the same hijab and familiar outfit whenever I pick them up from school. They're familiar with the outfit I wear to teach. Like a good parent, waiting in front of the gate under the sun. I should bring along umbrella. Little moment like holding hands while crossing the road are beautiful to remember. You won’t remember this little things when you grow up…because lots of other things happened during your childhood. 

I rejected lots of job offers recently, they called for home tuition. I'm not there anymore, will update my profile or maybe I'll just remove it. I don't feel like to add more students, focusing more on my family right now. I thought I will be active tutoring after professional exam ended because lots of free time, but the reality is way too far. I'm not interested to teach, serving my family is my choice. Forget about the handsome salary, my time is all I care about.

I met this one dr and he still do tutoring. Accidentally found out during oncall together.

Me: When do you teach your students if you're working?

Him: During offday. They don't want any other teachers to be replaced.

I feel you, once they're comfortable and the bonding is there...they don't want any other teachers. They'll choose you. 

This is just part of the hardship. Another hardship are their manner and monitor the progression. 

The fun fact is, whenever I go extra like put on make up and nice outfit, students become different. They don't feel sleepy even 1 hour passed by, respond to all the questions given, asked a lot and talked a lot. So I've to maintain pretty despite my hectic schedule to make the class interesting? Hahah you'll find more attractive teachers after this.

That's all, end of story.